I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
