P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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