Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize