I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
