she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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