He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
