i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize