I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Randomize
