Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
