If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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