Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
