Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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