There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize