You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
