So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
