Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
