have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
