Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
