DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
