# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
It's shark week go big or go home
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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