i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
