Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry mikelnika43 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(818): View more from California

Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?

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(805): View more from California

my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him

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(662): View more from Mississippi

She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.

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(714): View more from California

Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom

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(530): View more from California

I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack

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