nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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