youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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