theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
