i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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