worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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