Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
