i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize
