Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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