i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Randomize
