hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
