Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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