Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
