I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
