Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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