I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
honey bunches of taint.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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