So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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