We're like a lot better than the average bears
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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