guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
You dont lie about slip and slides
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
