so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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