that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize