Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I am full of burrito and curiosity
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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