Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
