My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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