All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
