dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
