Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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