Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
