1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
